Friday, October 1, 2010

A Happy 2nd Birthday to my boy!


A scheduled C-section allowed me to pick his birthday. I am a lover of October and Fall. When I knew it was an option to have my baby in this month, I sacrificed some very uncomfortable last few days of pregnancy to make it happen!

Gavin was born healthy, and off I was wheeled away for about 8 hours to get my vitals under control. I just wanted to hold my little boy! We did not want to know his gender, and I will always cherish that intimate moment between Troy, Gavin and I. The moment we knew we had another son, and Landon, had a baby brother.

My pregnancy was abnormal. I was on bed rest. We thought we lost Gavin at about 9-10 weeks, but he held on. It was a miracle to me when I found out, in an unfamiliar hospital, there was still a beating heart. The moment when the ER doctor explained to me I was still pregnant, was shocking. The words following "... but this is probably the start of a miscarriage..." is all I heard. We left the hospital (we were temporarily living in Las Vegas at the time), and my OB demanded to Troy that we come home. We packed the car, and left 2 hours later. The dreaded drive home...

Hours passed, and our baby held on.
Days passed, and our baby held on.
Months passed.... and our baby held on.

The subchorionic hematoma that caused us to think we lost Gavin initially was not healing. To begin with it was somewhat large, and not getting better. We were approaching 6 months, and I was faced with the reality of a possible still born. Something my mind could not even grasp, and at the time, I couldn't really tell anyone. I couldn't even really relay those words.

My baby held on. But my mind was trying.

The anticipated words that "everything will be ok" in last month of pregnancy was music to my ears. Hindsight, that difficult pregnancy was almost a foreshadowing of events to come. Shortly after Gavin's birth, we were again given news. News that he was blind, and there was no cure. Gavin had it together, he was fine. My mind was trying, and I had a difficult time conveying in words to others what was going on. Hence this blog. This was my way to reach those around me, at a time when I couldn't even open my mouth without sobbing.

Gavin was fine. And I was trying to be.

Days went by, months went by, and now 2 years have gone by.

Gavin is fine. And so am I.

This little ball of stubbornness brought the world around him a shining light, even through his world of darkness. I treasure him, I value him, and I love him.

Happy Birthday to my precious little boy! You are perfect, and stunning. But we will continue what we are doing, to make sure you have an option.

Through you, and for you, we will continue the fight!


  1. Why do you always make me cry! Happy Birthday to you Mr. Gavin!

  2. Beautiful heartfelt mother's post! Thank you for sharing these sweet words! Happy Birthday little Gavin!

  3. A true testament of a mother's love. Thank you for sharing and a HB to Gavin!
    ~ Meghan

  4. He was a miracle from the beginning and now he's one in a million. Something greater is waiting for Gavin, he was put on this earth for a reason. He amazes me every time I see him. Happy birthday tomorrow Gavie Monkey. God chose the perfect family for you to be born into.
    Grandma OG :)

  5. I have never seen such love from one family, group of friends, and entire community. This little boy exudes happiness, and it radiates in his smile.
    Happy second birthday, Gavin!
    God sure did the right thing, and place you exactly where you need to be, in the arms of Jennifer and Troy.
    Many blessings for a great celebration and a wonderful 2nd year!
    Here's to terrible twos! :P


  6. Thank you for sharing the world with your adorable litte boy!


  7. Traci McArdle-JohnsonOctober 1, 2010 at 9:30 PM

    I agree with Holli that when ever I read your posts my eyes fill up with tears. Happy Birthday Gavin. Jennifer and Troy GOD blessed you with Gavin because he knew you two were strong enough to handle it and make a difference in so many people's lives.

  8. I follow your blog, but don't often comment. Actually, here in the office we call it the SUNSET blog. We all check in to see how your little boy is doing, and are so inspired by your efforts. Your family is amazing! Thank you for the dose of inspiration and so happy you received a much deserved award! Maybe you will post more often (hint). :]~
    happy birthday Gavin from some big fans!
    Trudy, Carol, Lisa and the whole gang from Prestige!

  9. I'm also a lurker (and also someone who has received Gavins Groupies shirts and bracelets) and do not comment but HAPPY SECOND to your little boy! What a smile he has! I look forward to reading all of his accomplishments of his second year.
    Many Blessings

    Kelly *I placed the large Braille shirt order. I absolutley admire how much time you put into each one. My work is passing around the order form!

  10. Thank you for the quick turnaround for our shirts! I know we also had a large order as well, but am so happy we had them for our fundraiser day. We received so many questions, just what we wanted!
    Hope your little one had a wonderful day celebrating his special day!

  11. I am finally getting to that "I'm ok" phase. I have been stuck in the sadness too long and have always admired your strength. I often look at the emails we exchanged over a year ago. I cannot believe he is 2!

    Thanks for sharing your story of your miracle with us!



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